Maudlin Reverie of the Present

Today was my Friday.  It seems that not only is time relative, but so to are the days of the week.  On this, my Friday, I find myself succumbing to sentimentality about work, life, the universe, you name it.  Earlier today, my girlfriend drove out to my work and took me out for lunch.  It was just a simple lunch of McDonald's - my cheeseburger was decidedly lacking in cheese and the fries were less than hot - but it was such a treat for me.  Hannah drove us out near the river and we watched geese waddling around while we ate and talked about twenty questions and marriage equality.  She wore a red and black shirt and a big red ribbon in her hair because today it is the color of red that means freedom of love.

On the way back to work she pulled in to a gas station and I zipped inside and grabbed us a king sized Almond Snickers that we shared.  All in all it made an otherwise long day feel much shorter.  The rest of the day was spent tending to our sparse spattering of customers (I don't know why the weekdays are lagging so bad now!) and reading I am Legend by Matheson.  Just the other day I finished The Road by McCarthy.  Can you tell I'm on a Dystopian kick?  The Imagine Dragons song "Radioactive" could be the unofficial theme song of The Road.

I've been thinking about my job a lot lately.  There are many things to love about it, but what I love the most, is the fact that, even though I still have moments of great uncertainty and I often put my foot in my mouth, I'm allowed to be myself.  I'm quirky, I'm loud, I'm a little silly (well... more than a little) and this October I will be celebrating six years of a lesbian relationship.  In other work environments, I've had to keep my insanity bottled up to the point of explosion and I didn't dare mention Hannah as anything more than just 'a friend.'  In the event that I did refer to Hannah as my mate/partner/girlfriend/sex slave a whole world of assumptions came crashing down on me and the thick air of 'don't hang your dirty laundry out on the line' kept things awkward and quiet.  The truth is, I thought I was odd and different because I don't consider myself a lesbian at all (my relationship is lesbian but I'm not), and I frowned at things like 'Oh, so you eat carpet,' and 'Don't you think Leonardo DiCaprio is sexy? Wait you don't like dick.  Sorry I forgot.'  I'm not a lesbi-femi-Natzi-man-hater!  This is however, often the immediate conclusion when someone finds out that I am in a same-sex relationship.  It surprises them when I say of Gerard Butler "I would slob his nob any day of the week."

But at work, the awkwardness of assumptions is gone.  There are six of us and five of us have significant others who's names are synonymous with our own.  It's comforting and necessary.  When my supervisor introduced me to her daughter a few months ago she said, "And this is the newest member of our family."  I have to say that I've never considered work a home away from home, never thought of my coworkers as aunts and cousins, but at LHB that's exactly what it's like.  I'm so thankful for this.  They ask me how my homework is going, they talk to me about Hannah and make yummy sounds when I tell them what she makes me for dinner.  They give me hugs, they engage in banter, they giggle with me and they treat me like an adult while still respecting my child-like nature.  I'm gushing, I know, but how often do we get to say 'I love my job?'

As far as homework is concerned, I have been reading quite a bit as previously mentioned.  I haven't written much on my novel this month, but I have some days off this week and want to at least get into the heart of chapter three.  Tomorrow will be dedicated to craft analysis.  I'm trying for a longer one this time around and also I'm looking to add a secondary source.  I like the way the packets are set up, honestly; there is little pressure to follow a tight structure - the drive is to find creativity even in critical writing and I absolutely love that.