Creative Thesis is Done!

Tonight I sent in 130 pages in PDF format to be bound as my Creative Thesis. I cannot believe that I'm here. I truly cannot believe that I am graduating. This last semester was truly awful for me. I'm the reason it was awful. I let depression and insecurity following my illness in January, really destroy my drive and ambition. By the time I should have been editing a full manuscript I was still trying to compose and figure out the rest of the first part. So I figured I would NOT be graduating. I figured that I had wasted everyone's time. I'd wasted my mentor's time. Her energy and her effort. I'd wasted it all. But she didn't let me throw in the towel. In fact she got down right mean about it! Which is what I needed. Back when she first became my mentor I handed her over a metaphorical whip and said, go for it. Hit me with this whip until I feel it in the marrow of my bones. And in the end that's exactly what it took. I descended into the Great Below and was reborn. That might seem a pretty intense metaphor for graduating an MFA program, but that's exactly how it has felt. 

Tonight I'm turning in my end of semester evaluation. And then all I have left is to figure out the logistics and prepare for the residency classes. I'm frustrated because there's a new law in Massachusetts saying that all students have to have health insurance. Which wouldn't be such a big deal except that they want to charge me over $200 for the ten days I'm there in July. So I'm trying to figure out what to do about that, but aside from this little snafu I am just about ready. I have work tomorrow but then have a three day stretch. I'm going to get as much done for the residency as possible. I want to be able to relax in June when I go on the IEPG camping trip. After I get back from the residency I'm going to be applying for a new job. Also I'm going to bust my hump getting into a writing routine. Sandra has faith in me that I really can get published. And I'm starting to maybe have some faith in myself as well. Right now I feel like I have a world of possibilities opened up before me. So we'll just see what happens. In the mean time, I know for a fact that I am going to graduate and I'm letting this knowledge warm me up in a way I haven't felt in a long time.